It’s definitely not your fault: Overcome self-blame

‘Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. ‘ 1 Peter 5:7 NLT

“It’s definitely not your fault”, this was what someone once said to me after I shared about the death of my father. However, for the longest time, I used to blame myself for his death. Not that I was at all responsible, however the enemy planted the lie that kept me bound for over 15 years. After discovering the healing power of God and the anointing I carry, I thought maybe, just maybe had I prayed for him then he would have lived longer. I was constantly angry at myself for making the silliest mistakes. I pushed for perfectionism.

God helped me overcome self-blameIt’s definitely not your fault, be responsible for your lifePrayer

God helped me overcome self-blame

My deliverance came one morning whilst in bed as I read Romans 8:1 TPT which says: ‘So now the case is closed. There remains no accusing voice of condemnation against those who are joined in life-union with Jesus, the Anointed One. ‘ I felt a weight lift from me. Although I believed I could have saved my father, it was not my fault he had died. And God certainly wasn’t angry with me.

Jesus Christ’s family line somewhat mirrors our own families today. Generation after generation are stories of brokenness, sin, shame, death, and secrets. However, through the lens of these stories, what we see is God’s abundant mercy. God is encouraging us in the text, to cast all of our worries and concerns to Him.

What gave rise to your anger, bitterness, paralysis or negative response to life situations? Was it an experience with abuse, growing up in a godless environment or maybe in a culture where you were told you wouldn’t amount to anything that has thwarted God’s purpose for your life? What limitations has your upbringing done in you that are contrary to God’s word about you? Please do an honest assessment of your beliefs and how those have shaped your relationships, decision-making, career and even your identity.

Today I want to say to you, “it’s definitely not your fault”, although you have the responsibility to change it. You can choose knowledge and learn about your destiny based on what God says about you, and this is your part to play to make changes.

It’s definitely not your fault, be responsible for your life

‘Stop imitating the ideals and opinions of the culture around you, but be inwardly transformed by the Holy Spirit through a total reformation of how you think. This will empower you to discern God’s will as you live a beautiful life, satisfying and perfect in his eyes.’ Romans 12:2 TPT

Sometimes as believers, we put on this mask or we mask up the pain the thoughts and the struggles before God himself because of guilt. What the bible teaches us in the real-life encounters God had with His people is that where there is vulnerability before Him, men and women find healing and fulfilment of purpose.

When God says when we are weak He is strong, it means our ability to unmask alludes to the fact that we cannot do it on our own. God wants to heal you today! He wants you to know that you can overcome the self-blame that the abuse happened to you, or that you made a mistake somewhere in your life. It was not your birth that caused dysfunction and violence in your family.

You had nothing to do with the death of your parents. And it’s not your fault that you ended up with a narcissistic spouse. God knows what you have been through and what your truth was growing up.

It’s definitely not your fault that the patterns in your life and bad habits that are seemingly normal have become your identity. Sometimes even the seemingly good deeds we do built on a the wrong foundation keep us bound and striving to prove a point. Overcome all the habits you do, such that you have to prove a point because you are holding onto self-blame.

Change starts with an honest assessment of why you think and respond as you do. Remember the bible tells us that as a man thinks, so is he. This means our response to life, our behaviour and our actions are reflective of our wiring (in our mind).

If you would like to learn to rewire your mind, I have created this FREE 7-day eBook called The Mind of Christ where you learn to change your mind into what God has originally wired us to be.

Prayer

Heavenly Father, thank you for delivering me from the bondage of self-blame. Thank you Father that through the death of Jesus, I am free from any condemnation and I know that whatever has happened to me that has resulted in pain, shame, guilt, and mistrust, is not my fault. I commit now to taking responsibility for the life you have given me, so that I can live out your purpose for my life in Jesus’ Name, Amen

Learn how to take charge of your thoughts here Don’t let satan control your mind.

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    Kundai Zhou is a Jesus lover, author, and entrepreneur who is using her gifts, skills and experience to help people realize their true identity in Christ. Kundai's highest calling is to serve as a voice of restoration to believers who walk in doubt and whose hope has deferred. Her books are encouraging people around the world to become everything God created them by building their relationship with God and walking in dominion and authority whilst fulfilling their life purpose.

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